French doctor: Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another and have him looking for work in six weeks.
German doctor:That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in, and have him looking for work in four weeks.
Russian doctor: In my country medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.
Texas doctor: You guys are way behind ; we recently took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the White House for eight years, and now half the world is looking for work.
Part of the Dream Weave Walk 1999-2010
Showing posts with label bush. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bush. Show all posts
Joke 22: Can the English language survive after Bush?
"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country. "
- George W. Bush
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
- George W. Bush
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared '."
- George W. Bush
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future. "
- George W. Bush
" The future will be better tomorrow." George W. Bush
" We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
- George W. Bush
" I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
- George W. Bush
"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe We are a part of Europe."
- George W. Bush
" Public speaking is very easy."
- George W. Bush
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
- George W. Bush
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur. "
- George W. Bush
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
- George W. Bush
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children. "
- George W. Bush
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- George W. Bush
" It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
- George W. Bush
- George W. Bush
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
- George W. Bush
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared '."
- George W. Bush
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future. "
- George W. Bush
" The future will be better tomorrow." George W. Bush
" We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
- George W. Bush
" I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
- George W. Bush
"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe We are a part of Europe."
- George W. Bush
" Public speaking is very easy."
- George W. Bush
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
- George W. Bush
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur. "
- George W. Bush
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
- George W. Bush
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children. "
- George W. Bush
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- George W. Bush
" It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
- George W. Bush
Joke 2:Bush- Business as usual
Air Force One arrives at Heathrow and President Bush strides to a warm and dignified reception from the Queen. They are driven in a 1934 Bentley to the edge of central London where they change to a magnificent 17th century carriage hitched to six white horses.
They continue on towards Buckingham Palace, waving to the thousands of cheering Britons; all is going well.
Suddenly, the right rear horse lets fly with the most horrendous earth-shattering fart ever heard in the British Empire. The fart shakes the coach. The smell is atrocious! Both pssengers in the carriage must use perfume-dipped handkerchiefs over their nose, but the two dignitaries of state do their best to ignore the incident.
The Queen turns to President Bush saying, "Mr. President, please accept my regrets. I am sure you understand there are some things that even a Queen cannot control."
Bush, with his usual diplomatic aplomb, replied,
"Your Majesty, do not give the matter another thought. Until you mentioned it, I thought it was one of the horses."
They continue on towards Buckingham Palace, waving to the thousands of cheering Britons; all is going well.
Suddenly, the right rear horse lets fly with the most horrendous earth-shattering fart ever heard in the British Empire. The fart shakes the coach. The smell is atrocious! Both pssengers in the carriage must use perfume-dipped handkerchiefs over their nose, but the two dignitaries of state do their best to ignore the incident.
The Queen turns to President Bush saying, "Mr. President, please accept my regrets. I am sure you understand there are some things that even a Queen cannot control."
Bush, with his usual diplomatic aplomb, replied,
"Your Majesty, do not give the matter another thought. Until you mentioned it, I thought it was one of the horses."
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